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May. 17th, 2016 | 11:19 am

More bad dreams whooo

a sense of dreadCollapse )

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(no subject)

Mar. 13th, 2016 | 06:29 pm

Keeping this thing going as a bad dream blog I guess. I was thinking the other day that I hadn't had any bad dreams in a while, and then I had like five of them at once.
It's late in the day so I don't remember a lot of what happened, but even after waking up properly I didn't remember much either. I don't even know if I woke up several times or if I just dreamed I did. I think I woke myself up yelling at one point?

Anyway here's what I remember
Dreamy dreamCollapse )

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another one for the books

Aug. 10th, 2015 | 08:21 am

upside: last night's bad dream wasn't as terrifying as the 'first' bad dream, but considering it haunted me within the dream itself, and was starting to creep into later dreams, i'm going to record what i remember and hope that clears things out.
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(no subject)

Jan. 6th, 2015 | 01:47 am

I've been thinking lately that I miss LJ. I mean, I like Tumblr a bunch, it's got a lot of stuff going for it, but I miss the...sense of community? i guess is the term I'm looking for.  I liked the fancommunities and the fact that it was easier (for me, at least) to talk to strangers and meet people. I also liked how everything was more writing-based, because as much as I love beautiful graphics and gifs I also love Walls of Text sometimes.

And I am definitely looking at this through some sort of rose-tinted glasses because LJ was my first experience of fancommunity , but still. I do miss it.

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another bad dream

Aug. 31st, 2014 | 12:50 pm

also it's great to see my icon again, seeing as i'm rewatching farscape now and just got to my love sikozu.

anyway, this one wasn't the horrorfest that previous dreams have been, but I was pretty upset when I woke up, so here goes:
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Apparently this is now my nightmare blog

Jan. 30th, 2014 | 02:59 pm

or bad dream blog, considering how I distinguish between the two.

To be fair, this one wasn't as bad as some of the others I've had. It didn't leave me feeling shaky and upset. But it was pretty alarming in the moment
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Another bad dream

Nov. 7th, 2013 | 07:14 am

I have to keep this account open somehow, so I'm going to write about the bad dream I had last night
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Media Fast

Mar. 20th, 2013 | 01:15 pm

Before I started using the Internet on a regular basis, I basically read all the time. I mean, I played with friends and everything, but I read A LOT. And I'd shut everything out so that it was just me and the book. Forever. It sounds kind of cool, being able to focus like that, but most of the time it meant that I'd forget about schoolwork and chores and basic human things like eating or grooming. And whenever I was forced to stop reading because of class or sleeping or whatever, my brain would stay in book-world and it was great for me but pretty awful for school and such.

I mention that because I had to do a media fast for my sociology class earlier this week- three days, no texting, TV, movies, music, non-school-related computer use, everything. Reading and making phone calls were the only things we were allowed to do.

So I read. I read just over 900 pages on Sunday (finished up The Girl Who Would Be King and all of Kushiel's Mercy), both Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and Through the Looking-Glass, as well as half of Sherwood Smith's Inda on Monday, and finished Inda and got stuck in to The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms yesterday. And I forgot I had a paper due, I forgot I had a quiz, and I forgot about an assignment. I barely remembered to do my contribution for a group project, and I half-assed that. It was like before the Internet, and it was kind of scary. It was difficult to think of anything that wasn't my books, I was completely stuck in book-world.

And I guess what was the worst part is that I thought I had conquered that part of myself, the obsessive, single-minded-to-the-point-of-destruction part of me but nope, it's still there. And I guess saying "to the point of destruction" sounds kind of melodramatic, but when I was in that phase I got nothing done, and if it extended I know my grades would have ended up slipping and things would have been bad and I would have retreated even further into book-world, which would just make things worse.

Anyway, people give the Internet and media a lot of shit, saying that it ruins attention spans and such, but honestly, I'm probably more on the ball now than I was before. Having a bunch of things to focus on means that there's more opportunity for the important stuff to get noticed.

I'm not entirely sure what I want to say, other than I wasn't a fan of myself for the past three days and I wanted to make another post here.

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(no subject)

Aug. 20th, 2012 | 11:20 am

Wowww I have really fallen out of using this thing.

But it's still good for writing down the terrifying dreams I have!

Magical terrifying adventure into my subconsciousCollapse )

So yeah, basically I'm going to be on edge all day

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Only Two Weeks Left

Jun. 25th, 2012 | 04:31 pm

I just started my fifth week, which means it's this week and the next and then DONE. Part of me is happy, because that means that I can see my family and don't have to do homework, but it's also kind of sad because Germany is pretty great. Class has its ups and downs, but I do think my language skills have improved, even if only marginally, and there's so much to see here. And such delicious food to eat.

Last week was a little heavier than usual. On Wednesday we went to the Wannsee Conference House, where the Nazis made the decision to commit genocide. Wannsee is gorgeous, and the house was too, and it made everything a little more horrifying, to think of such a terrible thing happening at such a lovely place. Something I thought was interesting was how the information consistently used the word 'murdered' to describe the victims of the Holocaust. So often I see 'killed' or 'died', and it was good to see the more aggressive 'murdered' used.

I was sick on Friday. All gross and head-coldy and I actually went home early so I could sleep. I was still a little sick the rest of the weekend but not AS sick, which is what really matters.

But this weekend we went to Weimar! Which is such a lovely place, all old and historical and with a gorgeous park. I had the Thuringer bratwurst, because that's the specialty, and it was pretty delicious. And I also had the second most delicious fries I've ever eaten (second only to the Belgian fries I had in New Zealand), for 2 euros, in a giant takeaway box, from a Turkish doner restaurant. And hazelnut ice cream (I really like a lot of the food I can get in Germany, ok?).

We took a tour of the city, which, as I said, was lovely. We also saw Goethe's house, and toured that, and it was pretty interesting. The hostel was blah, but I fell asleep pretty early, so whatever.

On Sunday we visited Buchenwald. It was...heavy. It's not really something I think I can describe, seeing the empty spaces and empty buildings, and the wreaths and the stones on the memorials and the autopsy table. We had a fantastic guide, and he told us about how after the Americans liberated Buchenwald, they made 1000 Weimar residents walk through the camp to see what it was they had ignored, and how he got to talk to one of the women who had been chosen. She was head of the women's division of the Nazi party in Weimar, and she insisted the entire thing was a publicity stunt by the Americans, and that it their fault that there were people dead and dying in the camps. It's a terrible story, but I think it's important, too, to see how some people refuse to accept the truth even when it's right in front of them. There's no helping those people.

Anyway, hoping to make the most of my two remaining weeks.

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